


Probably. Probably Not

by FriendlyNeighborhoodBanana (What_Zit_Tooya), What_Zit_Tooya



Category: Underfell (Video Game), Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Attempt at Humor, Bara monsters, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fluff, I don't know how that happened, I want angst but i don't know where to put it, Kinda, Monsters are bigger than humans, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader and BP are chums, Reader is AFAB - Freeform, Reader is hardworking with jobs, Reader is pretty chill for the most part, Sans is very very bad with women, Underfell, bad flirty sans, burn is unknown, but at the same time, but is pretty much lazy in everything else, children close your eyes, cursing, cuz that shit is cool, depends on the audience, ha so you know that stereotypical uf sans where all ladies would swoon over him?, i do not condone plagiarism, i hope people will read this, i sweat when I see my hits increase, if any of my concepts are similar with other fics then it's just a coincidence, monsters are not that bad, oh no it's a school au now, oh well, plot-ish, prolly skippable, references, teacher sans, they just...have problems, yeah we don't roll that way here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:00:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24538870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/What_Zit_Tooya/pseuds/FriendlyNeighborhoodBanana, https://archiveofourown.org/users/What_Zit_Tooya/pseuds/What_Zit_Tooya
Summary: Losing a job sucks. Especially if you lose the said job(s) because of very stupid reasons that not even momma destiny can foretell. She just scratches her head and shoo you off to say "this happens to everyone". Well it's not like you can complain anyway. This kind of thing happens all the time (16 times to be exact) so you guessed that you just have to count your pennies and hope for the best. Though you weren't poor by any means, just very unlucky when it comes to jobs.Extremely so.A few cereal boxes later, you were about to give up and offer your flesh and blood to feed your cat since your wallet was becoming a literal nest for moths when--suddenly--your ears picked up the hallelujahs of the newly opened monster-human school. They have a few vacant job spots and not to mention that your monster pal was also working there part-time.Ignoring your friend's warnings, you dove straight in with a shrug.Besides, who were you to be picky?
Relationships: Alphys/Undyne (Undertale), Other Relationship Tags to Be Added, Sans (Undertale)/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	Probably. Probably Not

**Author's Note:**

> I can't write for shit, man. Not even corpses can find my stuff entertaining, and not in a morbid way. *opens door* You can leave if you want. I ain't stopping you.
> 
> But if you're a brave, brave boy--*closes door*--welcome. Want some chips?

Arriving at the red on-wheels-establishment, you parked your vehicle on an empty (and thankfully legal) spot. Pocketing your jingling keys that had an ugly Hawaiian hula girl keychain, your car's gentle purring immediately stopped once you shut off the engine. You then closed the car's door with a slam, gave your car keys a quick ring and headed towards the MTT food truck to fill your wailing stomach with some grub.

The man behind the counter, "Burgerpants" no-last-name-given, was scrolling through his phone while sitting down on a chair, his tail wagging absentmindedly. He didn't seem to notice your approaching form since the ever so fidgety cat didn't even wince when you quietly sat down on one of the plush stools, making sure to avoid the one with the gum.

Nonchalantly, you propped an elbow on the counter. 

"Hey."

In an instant flash, the monster jumped-- _literally_ , standing on his toes and almost crawling on top of the chair with a feline hiss, his orange fur standing up a bit. The soft looking paws of the monster somehow grew individual nails, each were curled and sharp like tiny blades, carving marks on the chair's wooden surface. It was kinda cute. Hilarious, but cute. It took every fiber of your being not to laugh right then and there.

Heaving from the sudden fight or flight instinct, his panicked eyes landed on your waving form, nonchalant as if you didn't scare the living daylights out of him. The cat monster groaned with embarrassed realization, hopping off of the chair and looking at his surroundings to see if there was anyone else that saw his sudden reaction. Well, anyone except the grinning bastard that was currently staring at his every move with pure amusement.

"(Y-Y/N)... _please_ stop doing that! You know I'm on high alert when I'm stationed on the human city! _Oh, for fuck's sake…"_ The last part came out as an angry grumble, scrunching his face as he tried to fix his now pointy hair. Damn, he forgot his comb back in his apartment...

You drooped. "Whoops, sorry."

Staring down at you, a disapproving look was sent your way, a frown etching his face. "Oh, don't bother hiding it. You're just sad because you didn't bring your phone to gain more blackmail material."

A snicker, followed by a shrug--that was the only reaction that he needed to confirm his suspicions. Rolling his eyes, he picked up a frozen patty.

_"Sigh..._ Burgers, right?"

You leaned down and listened to your stomach's gurgling, the edges of your mouth lifting ever so slightly. "Affirmative, captain."

He muttered a "whatever" and placed the clump of meat on the already oily flat-top grill, the smell of _food_ causing you to drool a bit--as always. However, the sizzling of the patty wordlessly reminded you that no matter how hungry the customer (you) is, the "MTT'S GLAMOROUS FOOD TRUCK PALACE" isn't exactly...an ideal place if you're a go-to healthy eater. It's something along the lines of _"every food inspector's nightmare"_ or _"Gordon Ramsey's rage buster"._ But Burgerpants doesn't seem to mind, and you certainly don't either. The food isn't chaotic to the point of not passing the standards of some people, and oddly, that's enough for you. It's fast, it's food, it's cheap--truly, it's all that you can wish for. After all, the displaced prices on the menu basically played a harp to your wallet, for once. That's just a deal that you literally can't afford to let go.

As the once pink patty slowly turned red (you just chalked that up as a monster thing), a five minute "silence" suddenly fell upon the two of you. The cars' loud honks, the random conversations from afar and just the everyday sounds of your bustling city acted as some sort of background noise, the ones being close to you were more apparent. Nothing out of the ordinary. Whenever you come here, it's always like this. It's either you talk or don't talk--it's as simple as that. Most of the time, you just eat quietly and you merely enjoy the silence between you and the pussycat. Though, you do await the times when he tells you a story about...anything, really--each one being so hilarious and interesting.

_'Well, might as well strike a conversation instead of thinking of having one.'_

Eyeing the ginger cat, you blew a strand of hair away from your face.

"So…"

"...So?" He parroted.

You tucked the blown locks behind your ear. "What's up with the new monster-human school that I've been hearing about? It's been _quite_ a hot topic lately..." You questioned, knowing that the conversations that circled around the topic weren't exactly 'pleasant' ones. Better not tell him _that_ little tidbit of news. It'll certainly sour the mood.

Shrugging, Burgerpants flipped the single patty with his spatula. "Oh, _that._ Heh, well...that's kind of funny actually since _I_ work there. Uh, part-time cafeteria man…" He mused, hiding the fact that Mettaton himself forced him to work there. "...Que--I mean, Lady Toriel opened up that school just a few weeks ago. It's the…'Buttercup School'. I think that's what it's called? Anyway, it was her and the little buddy's idea. Something about opening a bridge for both humans and monsters? Ugh, I dunno..."

His mouth suddenly fell, solemn. "...Though, I've only seen like, seven or eight humans in that school? I even heard that two of them are going to transfer once they go to another grade..."

Almost instantly, you caught onto his gloomy look. Now that won't do that at all. "Well, it's better than nothing, amiright?" 

Luckily, the optimistic quip did the trick since he smiled fondly. "Yeah. Guess you're right…"

Deciding to change the subject with a cough, you lidded your eyelids in a nonchalant way. "Say...since the school was just built recently...is it like, newly opened or…?"

"Uh, yeah? It was announced in the news just a week ago, didn't you hear?" Hell, journalists from both species have been trying to get an interview from the goat lady ever since it was announced. Joining two different species of children in one building that was owned by a bunch of monsters? The idea was unheard of, insulting even (well, for the speciesists at least). Instead of forming a bond between two species, it just threw fire into the flame. Monster hate groups grew larger, bolder. And likewise goes for the human hate groups. People like you and him, that just wanted simple peace, couldn't help but draw out a sigh.

"Oh, whoops. I don't really watch news that often. It's just too…" You scrunched up your brows at the scene of two elderly women pushing around a young police officer. "... _negative."_

Burgerpants sneered at what you're looking at, but otherwise didn't make a comment. "Hm, figures--Hey, want a drink with that burger?"

A thoughtful hum fell upon your pursed lips. "Hmm...I would say a hot cup of coffee, but since I know that you don't really serve those…" You pursed your lips even more. "...A soda would be nice."

The cat merely nodded, snatching a cold can of your favorite soda brand from the chill freezer (that had literal giant ice blocks inside) and opening it with a single claw like a corkscrew. Shortly after placing it in front of you, he did a quick check on the hot patty before dimming it worthy for a promotion, grabbing the other ingredients (I.e. buns) along the way.

In one quick swoop, he used his spatula to make the food fly up in the air for a fraction of a second and it all _somehow_ landed on top of one another in one perfect sequence. No mess, no mistakes--it all became a normal burger. From the way his body moved so swiftly, one could obviously tell that this guy has been working under the robot celebrity for a very long time-- _though, you know that_ **_that_ ** _wasn't necessarily a good thing._

Three claps were given for the quick display. "Spongebob Squarepants who?"

He frowned from your cheeky smile. "Oh, shut up. Just shove this down your throat and choke." He said with a roll of his eyes as he placed the already plated burger on the counter. Smirking at his half-assed attempt at acting tough, you watched him sit back on his chair and scroll through his phone.

In an instant, the beautiful aroma of the burger quickly invaded your already abused nostrils. As if you were gluttony itself, you grabbed the burger by its buns and took a rather _large_ bite, thanking the pussycat through muffled chewing. 

"Welp." He placed a paw on top of his head and went back to scrolling through his phone, his expression disturbed. "I'm gonna have nightmares after this."

"You better." You mumbled through another bite. This time, you were going to let the wave of silence be when Burgerpants suddenly broke it with another "so".

"...So, why did you ask about the goat lady's school anyway?" His fur bristled once he saw a pic of Mettaton wearing _booty shorts_. Another image that would ensure an unpleasant set of nightmares.

Your mouth was halfway open, ready to take another bite. "Huh?"

"The school. Why did you ask about the school? It's pretty random for you to bring up a topic that doesn't revolve around money, shitty neighbors and those strange souvenirs that you like to show me." The monster rephrased, glancing towards you and scrunching up his brows once his eyes spotted your half eaten burger. For monster standards, the burger is pretty much a little snack, a kiddy's meal. But if you were to compare it to your average everyday human burger? It literally looked like a _beast._ Truly, your stomach is a black hole, confirmed.

You blinked. _"Oh._ Well, um, I'm sorta going to apply there."

"For what? Like, a job?"

_Munch._ "Mhmmm." Your answer was elongated, too caught up with the taste of the food.

"Wait, aren't you already working in a grocery store as a cashier?" Pointing a finger at you, he rose a brow from how long it took for you to reply.

..."I got fired."

A blink, and then an "oh" was his response. How depressing.

Taking another bite to distract yourself with food, you nodded. _"Yep_. A little Woshua came into the store to buy some cleaning supplies. But the boss lady suddenly got angry 'cause she said that the _filthy pest was staining the floor._ Ironic, I know--" You then swallowed. "--So, she started kicking the poor dude towards the door. The sad part there is that the Woshua didn't fight back. Hell, he didn't even say anything! Poor guy..."

He shifted on his seat. "Yeah, Woshuas tend to be real...shy."

"And by shy you mean being pushovers?"

His face grew more uncomfortable, more uneasy. "...Sadly, yep. They don't really have anything that can make them tough when we were living in the Underground."

You shook your head at that and continued, your sympathy growing steadily. "So yeah...um, I followed the poor guy outside and tried to give him bandages for the scratches that he got from being literally dragged on the floor. Heh, m'too much of a coward to actually step in and help him when he was being pushed out…" A sad smile wormed its way onto your features. "...But then the boss lady showed up and…" You trailed off, knowing that you didn't have to continue further. Your eyes caught his troubled countenance, as if he was remembering something. To defuse the situation, you waved a dismissive hand.

"Hey, it's fine. I was going to quit anyway since I know something like _that_ will come up eventually considering her bitchy attitude. Was just milking all the money that I could get from the woman." The words of reassurance were aimed at him, though it just felt like you were making excuses for yourself. Her insults hit too close to home after all. 

His face was painted with displeasure, feeling somewhat bothered. "...Well, if you're going to look for another job, why ask there? There's like, a bunch of other jobs in your city?"

Finally swallowing the last bits of the burger, you looked the other way. "This...isn't the first time I got fired."

A pregnant pause. "Huh, that actually explains…" He recalled the many odd clothes that you wore whenever you visited him, frowning. "...a _lot."_

And just like before, you shrugged it off and grabbed the soda can. "Yeah so that's why I'm gonna try and get a job there. I like monsters, I like kids. Any job can do well for me just as long as it pays the bills." The bubbly, fizzy liquid of the beverage hit your taste buds like spring water in a dessert. _Ooh,_ that calms the shakes.

The phone screen flashed, letting the cat know that his phone was on low battery. With a hum, he took out the small lava-based CORE charger and plugged it in. "Hm, well...whatever. You do you, kid. But I just gotta warn ya. The goat lady isn't exactly... _stable_ , if you know what I mean. From what I've witnessed, she ain't too skilled on handling certain... _situations._ Though she's mostly pretty neutral, just really overprotective of her children since she has the fear of losing them." He had to bite his tongue from saying the word 'again'. "She'll go onto a fit if she isn't...uh, calm. And Frisk is the only one that can actually soothe her worries...most of the time. So expect the little buddy to be around her _a lot._ "

"So she's like...pretty crazy?"

He chuckled dryly from your word choice. "Yeah...you could say that. Just don't tell that to her face. She really doesn't like it when people comment on her stability." Noticing the nod that you gave him from his advice, he continued. "And monster children aren't lil' pretty angels either. They're Satan's children I tell you! Most of 'em were born in the Underground so their version of 'fun' is the same with 'torture'. I remember that time when I was still living in a run down apartment from the Underground...A kid threw a rock at my windom at two in the fucking morning and tied my house with _yarn_ for literal shits and giggles! The little brat thought that it was fucking funny…" He grumbled angrily like an old man that was complaining about the kids that were thrashing his lawn--which is kind of funny considering that he's still a teenager. Looking your way, his frown deepened once he spotted your unfazed expression. It's as if his warnings fell on dead ears! You were just nonchalant as ever, your features unbothered from the fact that the school that you wanted to apply to is a literal nest for swarming devils and is owned by an overprotective goat guardian.

His eye twitches in irritation. He could never really understand your odd mind.

"Hey, Burgerpants." You called out his name, breaking the silence. Choosing to look up at him, you craned your neck upwards since he was still a couple inches taller than you despite considering himself as a "short" monster. You didn't know whether to find that strange, or offending.

A hum of acknowledgment was all he gave you to confirm that he was indeed listening.

"Um, putting all those things aside...can you, uh...do me a favor?"

He was obviously cautious of whatever you were gonna ask of him, but he listened anyway. "Hmm...spill."

Placing your hand inside your pocket, you fished out your money and put it on the counter. "It's nothing _too_ complicated. I just want you to go ask the school if they're hiring. It'll just be pretty embarrassing to, y'know, go in and find out that there's no need for any job applicants. And m'too shy to go ask them myself..."

A long pause was his very awkward response. Beads of sweat rolled down his fur like fountain water, his features scrunching into a nervous smile as he played with his paws. You didn't have to ask twice to know that his answer was a dignified 'no', a definite d-e-n-y.

"...So, basically, you want _me_ to talk to the principal? To _the_ Toriel that I just warned you about?"

You nodded, staring at his paw that took your money, counting it to see that it was in fact the exact amount needed. The cat then sighed and wiped his beads of sweat. "Look, pal, as much as I make a lot of suicide jokes, I don't _actually_ wanna die. I have a life to live for, a dream to fulfil, a _girlfriend_ to bang! I don't wanna be next night's dinner!"

You rolled your eyes at his reasonings, crossing your arms. "Dude, you're treating this like a real death sentence--"

"'Cause it is!--"

"--And I just really need you to do this! C'mon...Buddy, chum, pal, friend?" You batted your eyelashes. "Won't you do it for your kind and generous friend that you absolutely adore?" Now it was _his_ turn to roll his eyes at your reasoning.

His frown was still in denial, eyes refusing to meet your puppy dog eyes that you tried oh-so-hard to pull off. Once again, you huffed. Oh, he's going to play this game, is he? Heh, he'll budge eventually…

Making sure that your voice was loud enough for him to hear, you pushed away the plate and soda can to lean down on the counter, smiling innocently.

"...I'll buy you catnip."

The somewhat fluffy fingers of his paws twitched as if it was reaching for something that wasn't there, tail wagging in silent temptation. "...What else?"

"...I'll…" It took you a moment to think of something that could interest him more. "...erase half of my black material." Oh, just saying it hurts your heart, but it seemed to have paid off since he turned his gaze towards you, having an expression that said _"ONLY half?"_.

"And?"

You were hoping that he wouldn't say that.

Having nothing better to offer, you took out an old penny from your other pocket and pushed it towards him with a single finger. 

"Um, you can have my lucky penny?"

Silence. Ironically, that was all you could hear at that moment, only silence as you felt an inkling feeling of concern from his blank face.

Then, after a few agonizing seconds, what you said somehow drew a snicker from the cat. Soon, that snicker turned into a little laugh and it stretched for a long moment. His paws were placed on his face now, cheek fur slowly turning pink from amusement, the usual frown turned upside down.

Meanwhile, you stared at the cackling ginger cat, unamused and at a loss. And yet, you weren't _completely_ upset. Offended, sure, but definitely satisfied from the fact that he finally cracked a smile. Nowadays, his frown was so deep that you couldn't help but think that his mouth would eventually fall on the floor. Well, at least _that_ lifted your spirits a bit.

His pink nose scrunched up before letting go of his last snort. It seems that he was finally done laughing his kidneys off, and it took all your willpower to not shout the word _finally._

"Fine, fine. I'll _try_ to do your favor, lady." He then pushed back the penny. "But you can keep the damn penny. I don't think that I'll need your _fortune."_

You huffed at his obvious mocking, pocketing the small penny. "Hmph, suit yourself. Just gotta remind you that this penny won me a lottery, you know."

"Oh? And for what's worth?"

Your features instantly drooped. _"Twenty dollars…"_

A smug grin was plastered on his face, leaning on the counter with a tilt of his head, his red shaded eyelids lidded. "Heh, that's what I thought." He then flicked your nose in an act of spite from earlier. "Idiot."

And so, the remaining hours were spent by the two of you bickering at each other, making you completely forget about the nervous feeling in your stomach.

* * *

Parking your car inside your garage, you went back to your home and breathed out a relieved sigh, recalling the saying _there's no place like home._ Even though chatting with Burgerpants is a real fresh breather (considering that you could only talk to him once a week due to his strict schedule), just lazing around your home and doing whatever the hell you want is when you could let your chillest side run rampant like a crack induced gorilla.

With a quick mosey, you hurriedly went inside your not-so-humble abode, got your bills that seemed to have slipped from your door's letterbox and collapsed on top of your living room couch with your back turned against it. The soft (well, soft in _your_ standards) furniture squeaked under your weight, the couch pillows giving support for your pounding headache.

Okay, _maybe_ bickering with Burgerpants wasn't a good idea after all. Not that it was a good idea in the first place.

All too suddenly, a soft meow was heard from below you. Your cat, "Bandit" (due to the fact that the upper part of his head was completely covered with black fur), hopped onto your belly like the cheeky bastard that he is. He then laid there as he stared you down through your very soul--as if to say _"did you bring me food?"._ Not that you were gonna give him any. You already left him some food before you left! The little fucker just wanted to get more fat and lazy (thanks to you being a _wonderful_ role model). You swore if he gains more pounds, you're going to fix the old treadmill from your basement...

Despite your disapproving stare from his doe-eyed power move, you grinned affectionately, scratching the top of his head to not only give comfort for him, but for you as well. "Hey there, lil' Bandit. Didja guard the house like I asked?"

_"Moew."_ The tone that he used was high so you'll take that as a 'yes'.

"Man, you really are the bestest of boys!" You cooed, not really caring whether he actually understands you or not. Giving him his favorite belly rub, his motorboat-like purr snapped you out of your affectionate daze and you suddenly remembered Burgerpants. Can _he_ purr like Bandit? Well, he _does_ jump and hiss like a real cat so maybe it's not _too_ far fetched?

_'Hmm...I wonder what will happen if he sees Bandit...Gotta put that on my to-do list later…'_

Remembering something, you shifted a bit to get something from your side, careful as to not to disturb the almost snoozing cat. After all, disturbing your sleeping buddy is a crime in itself. Only the real despicables, the baddest of the bad, commit such immoral and horrible schemes.

Successfully pulling out the bills that got stuck in between your couch cushions (also known as the abyss), you read them all one-by-one and grinned in satisfaction once you saw that they all have far away due dates. It all at least gave you a chance to pay for everything, for now, since your budget can only pay for your and Bandit's food that may or may not last for only four to five days. Diddly darn...you knew that not saving money will bite you in the ass in the long run, but you just _had_ to be a real bitch to yourself and torture your piggy bank! How did you even lose that much money in the first place?!

You took a quick glance at the displayed souvenirs and random figurines on your shelf. Oh. That's why.

_'Maybe if I skip breakfast and cut portions for myself…'_ You thought as you breathed out a sigh, trying to calculate your estimations. Cutting Bandit's portion is an instant no after all. You just don't have the heart of steel to do that sort of thing to your pal. Hell, you felt like you were the most wanted person alive when you accidentally stepped on his paw a few days back. No amount of apologies can outweigh your sins.

_But,_ you thought to yourself, if you _do_ get the job then all your worries might go away as long as you keep the pay steady...Monsters provide actual _gold_ after all, they're practically stinkin' rich. With their mansion-like houses and large apartments, it's one of the only things that made the government favor them (which in hindsight...aren't that many…). If not for your species' weird grudge against monsters, they would probably have job applicants charging them from left and right…

...But then again, what if you _don't_ get the job? What if they refuse you right off the bat since you're just some random human? Sure it's a monster-human school but _that_ part is meant for the students, not the employees...

_'Not to mention that I have shit luck when it comes to any type of job...'_

A heavy silence made you close your eyes. Bitter and calm. That was the flavors of your mind as you thought of the many possibilities, the different estimations of what might occur. The many "if"s and " but"s swirling around like some batshit hurricane. Bitter and calm.

And yet, despite the lingering doubts that kept on hitting your head with a sack of coconuts, one sentence always tagged along to silence them.

_'Then I'll just try harder.'_ Just like always. Just like what mom taught you.

Strangely, that was the only thing that was needed to shush your bugging thoughts as you eventually snoozed off into dreamland, a soft thin line stretching your lips naturally, pure determination rushing through your veins...

...Its calls getting louder and louder.


End file.
